I haven’t written in a while. And the reason is simpler than I would like to admit. I met someone. And since then, every single free moment I choose to spend with him, as opposed to writing or doing anything else. Is that wrong? Maybe. But I have never felt happier.
Lately, I have been experiencing self-doubt. I became so addicted to this person in my life that I started putting myself second. And that was not right. However, I have also started smiling with my entire body more - something I have never done before. And that is a price I am happy to pay.
I realised that spending time with the person I love is not about forgetting about my needs, quite the contrary. With him, I can be truly myself. I can think and talk about anything I want but also, I can do nothing. Just laying in his arms, feeling his breath, heart and touch. Nothing else.
Call me a romantic, I cannot deny. I fell in love and I am happy. Got close to someone I did not expect to like me. It took so long that I almost lost hope. But now? All the wait was bloody worth it. And whilst realising what a cliche this is, every day, I love him more and more.
Having experienced two crippling relationships, I cannot quite comprehend this one. Forgive me for writing about love again, but I am truly fascinated by the subject. I thought I found love in myself and that was it. But only when I started treating myself lovingly, another kind of love came my way. And it appeared from a place I would have never expected.
My fascination with love developed into something more. I have started writing a book about (not only self)love, which gives me space to reflect and learn about love from different perspectives.
Every day, when I wake up with the thought of him and a gentle smile rushes across my face, I thank the universe for letting me experience this. I do not know if everyone in love feels the same. But what I do know is that I never felt so deeply, passionately and happy than I do now.
I thank my beautiful mind, body and soul for letting me experience it and I wish you, too, to encounter the same. Be kind, treat yourself with respect and adornment, and give love everywhere you go and it'll come back to you.