Be yourself. Stop pretending and trying to be someone else. Just be! A helpful advice many of us have received multiple times from many different sides. But when it comes to implementing it, how can we really let go of what happened in the past and what others might think of us and fully embrace what is to come in the near future?
Having spent a lifetime pretending to be someone else, meeting the judge face-to-face caught me by a surprise. The highest authority being my best friend. I am still very sceptical about the concept, but having someone who has seen you through your ups and lows, through your good and bad days, fully overdressed or completely naked does probably mean something. Who would have thought that moving in with someone so close would have you facing the mirror and hearing that damn honest opinion every day. Anything you’re afraid to say out loud, she hears. Anything you’re trying to hide, she finds. Anybody else you are trying to be, she kicks out. She has seen the best and the worst of you, she knows who you really are and, although you’re impulsively trying to hide it, she helps you find the real you. Sounds too good to be true, right? Well, it has its downside, but you will learn to work these out (eventually).
So, it is not about the meditation classes or the spiritual awakenings, although you will need enough time and patience before you can start finding your real self. Sometimes the best job is done by someone who isn’t you (although it might almost feel like s/he was). Having somebody by your side, telling you the truth 24/7 can be hard. But if you can put up with this kind of harsh, then you will survive anything!
A couple of months under one roof feels like forever. But it has been the best eternity of my life. It is tough and it is hard, but having someone constantly breathing down your neck, forcing you to stop trying to be the best version of yourself and simply just be is not too bad actually. After all, they are in for the ride (with an honest friend), and fake will just not do!